This list is awesome, and shall be referred to until December. Thank you and good night 🙂
10 indisputable rights of pregnant women:
1. She shall have the right to drop something and look around pitifully until someone feels bad enough to come along and pick it up.
2. She has the right to messy toenail polish. This includes the right to get a pedicure to avoid having messy toenail polish. Whether a pregnant woman decides to embrace her right to messy toes or a pedicure is her choice and she shall not be judged.
3. She has the right to spill food on her belly without being mocked.
4. She has the right to lay claim to any food in the house. All others shall assume the last piece of pie or the last serving of cereal has been claimed by this right unless told otherwise.
5. She has the right to waddle. Anyone in the presence of her waddling is restricted from laughing or gawking at said waddling.
6. She has the right to claim “pregnancy brain” at any time.
7. She has the right to moan, groan or grunt when getting out of a chair, rolling over in bed, putting on her shoes or doing any activity that requires shifting her weight.
8. She has the right to claim flip-flops as appropriate footwear under any circumstance.
9. She has the sole rights to the house’s thermostat. Do not question when she has the AC on and it’s 60 degrees outside or if she has the windows open while it’s snowing. Wear extra layers in the house without complaint.
10. She has the right to talk about being “large” or “huge”, but no one else can claim that right. She is the only person allowed to talk about her size.